What is Failure? How to Create a Relationship Breakthrough

What is failure?  How does failure look and feel to you?  Does getting help for a problem equal failure? The truth is we don’t always have the answers.  I certainly don’t always have the answers for myself. If you don’t know what to do about an issue and sometimes feel like you need a roadmap, asking for help is not failure.  

Therapy is not failure!  Unfortunately, the stigma and shame about therapy exists today. However, when you experience relationship struggles, turning to a professional might be just the antidote that you need to create a relationship breakthrough.

Here’s the deal – I’ve turned to therapists and mentors over and over again for help in my own life.  As a therapist, I’ve worked with partners together and separately. I’ve watched couples do the work. Professionally and personally, I’ve experienced how a relationship emergency can become a relationship breakthrough.  

What is Failure?

Failure is not asking for help.  If you’re in a state of relationship emergency, it can be a hard road to recovery.  It can be discouraging – like there is no getting past this issue and there is no light at the end of the tunnel.  It can feel like the relationship is done, and it’s time to throw in the towel. Repair is not always easy, even when you’re in therapy.

But, I believe that it is my job as a relationship therapist and intimacy breakthrough specialist to hold the hope for you.  If you’re coming in to see me or anyone on my team, you might feel at an all time low. Not everyone who seeks therapy does but it’s also not uncommon.

We want to be the hope for you.  Because, when you’re in the dark and difficult place in your relationship, it can feel impossible to see the hope for yourself.

How to Create a Relationship Breakthrough

When you’re brave enough to ask for help, when you’re self-aware enough to get help, therapy can be the savior of your love instead of the failure of your relationship.  The takeaway is that getting professional guidance helps you navigate the landscape of your relationship emergency. Guidance can be the answer to how to create a relationship breakthrough and lift yourself out of relationship trauma.

If you want to love and live better, then you have to step outside of your comfort zone.  Sometimes you can’t do it on your own. Sometimes you need support to change your perspective.

What do I mean by that?  Here are three things to consider:  

  1.     Change how you think about getting help

If you believe, which many people do, that reaching out for help means you’re a failure then that’s your fail point.  If this idea stops you from trying, if it stops you from asking for help, then it’s not the act of getting help that’s getting in your way.  It’s the belief that holds you back.

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  1.     Don’t assume that you know your partner’s story

Oftentimes when you’ve been married for years, you might think you know all there is to know about your partner.  And, that is not always the case. Yes, maybe you can finish each other’s sentences, but don’t assume that you know all there is to know about your partner’s story.  You might not know what is happening to them, at their core.

That’s why I created the 10-Day Intimacy Building Challenge – the link to sign up is below.  The challenge includes 10 days and 10 ways to deepen your connection and deepen your conversations.  The challenge is a process that you can and should practice more than once. Get curious. Each time you will discover something new!  

  1.     Relationship emergency can equal relationship breakthrough

A relationship emergency is a window for relationship opportunity.  If you’re struggling, if you’re having a hard time, it doesn’t have to mean the end.  For so many of you, it means there is a window to step through to the other side.

Like the saying goes – when one door closes another one opens.  If you can’t see the door, our door is open, and we’ll help you see the window of opportunity.  A relationship opportunity can present itself when you ask for help and put in the work. With proper guidance, you can create your own relationship breakthrough.  You can love your life and love your relationship!

Be in Love with your Life

I encourage you to be humble enough to know when you don’t have the answers.  As I mentioned before, I’ve been there in my own life. If you’re open to asking for help, you can create a relationship breakthrough out of a relationship emergency.  With a little guidance and a lot of hope, you can see another perspective. And, the result can be magnificent.

You can love and live better.  You can be in love your life. You can be in love with your partnership.

Here’s where to start…

Craving a more Intimate Relationship with your Partner?

Having a hard time navigating the conversation on your own?

If you feel lost on where to start, download my FREE Guide “10 Keys to Connection – Conversations that Strengthen Intimacy” and get started today! Download HERE.

2018-05-16T16:52:43+00:00