Get Your Sex Live Back on Track

Your sex life doesn’t sit in a vacuum.  In a long-term relationship, good sex is dependent on many things.  If there is any part of you that thinks sex should “just happen” – organically, naturally, fluidly, spontaneously, at will – well, you will be sadly disappointed.

I wish it was that simple.  Can sex happen that way? Absolutely… sometimes.  Which means that at other times, it takes conscious work.  My question for you is – Are you willing to do the work?

Life Obstacles

When you create a life together, you grow beyond the role of lovers.  You become life partners. You might be business partners. You may even opt to become parents.  And, you wear many hats in between. But somewhere in your journey, you begin to separate your sexuality.  It’s as if it becomes a separate entity, disconnected from all of the roles you play.

Your Sexuality

Remembering that your sexuality is part of you, part of your identity while you play all of those roles in life, is key to stoking the fire from within.  Paying the bills, shopping for food, or giving your child a bath does not erase your sexuality.  

The problem is that you become disassociated and disconnected.  You disassociate from that part of yourself. You disconnect from the fact that you’re a sexual being.  But, guess what? It’s there. It’s within you.  It hasn’t left.

Relationship Problems

Conflict in your relationship can also cause a disconnect.  Unresolved wounds, disagreements, absences, sexual incompatibilities, and more can make sex awkward, uncomfortable, and unwelcome.  Working through relationship difficulties can lead to a better sex life but even that is not a guarantee.